Mindful=Mundane

In my post, "Manifest What?," I noted one of my goals is mindful religiousness.  I could have used a word or phrase that is clearer to the reader, but there is a reason I chose those words.  There was a time when seeing or hearing the word 'mindful' emoted an eye-roll.  EVERY. SINGLE. TIME. I was not about to jump on that bandwagon.  Mindfulness was the newest fad, at least that is what I perceived.  And no one really practiced it.  No one really understood.

The only way I thought to check myself and my instinctive annoyance of the subject was to try to understand what it actually meant.  I did read a few articles AND websites on mindfulness and mindfulness according to Buddhism, since I was somewhat under the impression mindfulness is a practice central to Buddhist philosophy.  And while some of the info was enlightening, my eyes could not stop rolling.  After a while I put my "research" on the back burner.  I thought about it often, but I was done trying to figure it out.  Then one day I had an epiphany on the matter.

The process by which I troubled myself to understand what mindfulness was was in fact having (see -ful) noticed.  I noticed that I noticed.  I AM mindful.

My "research"1 was what practicing mindfulness was all about!  So check this out:

To understand read these entries from etymonline.com:

mind (v.)

mid-14c., "to remember, take care to remember," also "to remind oneself," from mind (n.). Meaning "perceive, notice" is from late 15c.; that of "to give heed to" is from 1550s; that of "be careful about" is from 1737. Sense of "object to, dislike" is from c. 1600; negative use (with not) "to care for, to trouble oneself with" is attested from c. 1600. Meaning "to take care of, look after" is from 1690s. Related: Minded; minding. Meiotic expression don't mind if I do attested from 1847.

-ful

word-forming element attached to nouns (and in modern English to verb stems) and meaning "full of, having, characterized by," also "amount or volume contained" (handful, bellyful); from Old English -full, -ful, which is full (adj.) become a suffix by being coalesced with a preceding noun, but originally a separate word. Cognate with German -voll, Old Norse -fullr, Danish -fuld. Most English -ful adjectives at one time or another had both passive ("full of x") and active ("causing x; full of occasion for x") senses.It is rare in Old English and Middle English, where full was much more commonly attached at the head of a word (for example Old English fulbrecan "to violate," fulslean "to kill outright," fulripod"mature;" Middle English had ful-comen "attain (a state), realize (a truth)," ful-lasting "durability," ful-thriven "complete, perfect," etc.).

The verb mind means "to care for, to trouble oneself with," while the suffix, ful, means the "volume contained."  So my "research", yes, an inquiry sound bite by sound bite, WAS mindfulness.  Ok, well, it wasn't exactly mindfulness, but it was mindful.  Baby steps!  The process by which I troubled myself to understand what mindfulness was was in fact having (see -ful) noticed.  I noticed that I noticed.  I AM mindful.  But it wasn't mindfulness.  And I'll leave it at that, because for now I'm focused on just being mindful. ;)So back to mindful religiousness.  To be honest, I could have used the word conscientious, because on the lowest rung of my true sense, that is what I meant.  But it's a bit more than conscientious.  While, I'm not planning on converting to Buddhism...  Is this a religion or a philosophy, by the way?  I had a friend correct me for labeling Buddhism a religion...  Anyway, I do mean to be mindful with a sort of religious fervor.

I've known a few people that prided themselves on being of the spontaneous sort.  One in particular, was always spontaneous.  But he meant it as impromptu.  Well, I didn't see how one could possibly be spontaneous 24/7.  It was a proud foolishness 24/7.  To be spontaneous to me, is the equivalent of what it means to have a dessert.  Dessert is a treat and is not the same as snacking.  He was snacker; that's how he meant he was spontaneous.  His snacking lifestyle was life on autopilot.  He was a being on a conveyor belt.  I do not want to live my life on a conveyor belt.  I don't want to go through the motions.  I don't want to do what everyone else does just because everyone else is doing it.  I want it all to have meaning. But I have to give it meaning.

You see while his implied definition of spontaneous meant impromptu, spontaneous does in fact mean "without effort or premeditation."  So in light of that, it really didn't matter how he meant it or how I understood it.  Because in the end his lifestyle impromptu or not was without effort or premeditation.  And so was mine.  And so is mine.  And I want to change that.

I don't want to live my life on a conveyor belt.  I want to trouble myself until the amount contained is filled with such devotion, that I give meaning to my life. My life does have meaning, but I want the volume contained of a meaningful life.  It's funny because people that are methodical, organized, and the like are looked upon as boring, not fun, inhibited.  And on the lowest rung, they are.  The others are following their natural instincts, their base motives.  And I don't mean this in a condescending tone! It's a challenge to practice good habits and follow mundane principles in every facet of life day in day out.  But I want that.  I want that because those mundane principles, done mindfully, will empower me to utilize the remainder of my time here to the highest rung of what my two sense entails.

Picture this:  Some children are fortunate enough to be taught to brush their teeth every morning and every night.  Some are taught to brush after every meal, and some are taught to brush after every meal and floss at least once a day.  They are respected by their mom or dad and in return respect their loving parent.  Because of this faith that they are doing something good for self, they generate love for self and continue a simple self-care ritual well into adulthood.  This love recognizes overindulgence of sugar and the need for regular dental check-ups.  Because of this mundane ritual, the very fortunate children are not bogged with dental issues.  And while mom or dad cared enough to share this wisdom, it was only because the self loved it's vessel enough to take care of it, that love was manifested!

And that's what I want.  I want to prove to myself that I love me.  I do!  And I will do it with such religious devotion, because I want to free myself from the conventions of time.  Because I need that time I stole from myself to love my neighbor.  I hope you are understanding what I mean by the rungs of my sense.  And over the course of this blog, I'll eventually paint a detailed picture.

So for now, I'll add goals and update as I see fit for my own personal accountability, so that I may be fully transparent to myself.  So that someone out there will listen to what I have to say.